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You don’t need to place a bag of chips strategically over the condom. You don’t need to pretend to be busy on your phone just to avoid eye contact with the cashier.
You don’t need to be embarrassed. Because you are a responsible adult making a practical purchase to stay clean, healthy, and, well…functional.
Yet, we still hesitate to purchase these items at the store.
Ps: I have included purchase links to these products to save you the embarrassment. You are welcome 🙂
1. Tissue in Bulk
Image: Amazon
That’s all I do: eat, sleep, and destroy my toilet.
2. Condoms
Image: Amazon
“Can I have that pack of condoms? No, not that one. The other one.”
3. Sanitary Pads
Image: Amazon
You could as well send your boyfriend to get them for you. But he’ll be stranded at the store asking the attendant for the right vagina size.
4. Bed Bug Spray
Image: Amazon
Yes, I am having a bed bug infestation in my house, and I’m not happy about it either. That’s why I’m here at the store, trying everything I can to fix it.
No, I don’t have bugs on my clothes, so you don’t need the extra social distancing.
5. Hemorrhoid Cream
Image: Amazon
I have a problem, and it’s exactly where you think it is.
6. Lubricant
Image: Amazon
That awkward moment when the cashier tries to scan your items extremely fast. But then they realize the barcode is unreadable. So, now you are both standing there waiting for the price check.
7. Underwears
Image: Jumia
You wear them, I wear them, everyone wears them. So, why am I suddenly embarrassed to purchase them?
8. Anti-Gas Pills
It’s bad enough that I’m dealing with a stomach crisis, but now I’m hoping I don’t run into someone I know while holding a bottle of Maximum Strength Gas Relief.
9. Pregnancy Test Kit
Image: Amazon
The negative glances from everyone aren’t the negative results you were hoping for.
10. Bidet Attachment
The tushy wiper? You mean the terrific tech that does everything for me while I scroll through Pinterest. I am overly obsessed with it.
11. Cucumbers
Image: Sea Wave
So, now buying groceries is cringe-worthy? Well, we have the internet and eggplant emoji to blame.
12. Diarrhea Relief
How do you tell the cashier that you are in a hurry and don’t want to talk about your weekend plans now?
13. Nose hair trimmer
Image: Amazon
If you think hair growing from my nose is weird, wait till you see my other places.
14. Rash cream (for awkward places)
Image: Amazon
Everyone in line knows I’m fighting a battle they’d rather not be part of.
15. Yeast Infection Treatment
Image: Amazon
It’s a totally normal and common issue, but somehow, you still can’t get around placing the bottle on the counter with your head up high.
We Are Humans
All the embarrassments and awkwardness prove one thing: we are humans with personal feelings and emotions.
Even when the cashiers have seen way worse, we’d still rather not share our bodily struggles with anyone, especially strangers.
I wish I had a solution (aside from shopping online), but I don’t. If it helps though, I go through the same ordeals almost every week.
